We now present the second of two rather bulky instalments of the F&L half term assessments for this house of Tynwald. This week we cover the Deep South and the West.
How have we scored your MHK?
Drop us a comment via: fearandloathingiom@email.com
You can also find Part One here:
The Deep South | |
Dr Michelle Haywood Oh no its the pathetic sharks Viz Magazine We can’t help being reminded of the classic Viz Magazine ridiculous predators that are known not for their ferocity but for their mind-numbingly boring and sad behaviour. It seems that almost every attempt by Dr Haywood to score a political point, or blow up an issue for political leverage, seems to arrive at some dramatic yet vaguely humorous anti climax where she probably wishes that she hadn’t really bothered taking aim in the first place. You can generally tell the MHKs who have been village commissioners in a previous life and here once more it rings true as round after round of passive aggressive Parish Pump volleys get fired out in the press which appear to miss their targets by a country mile. Her latest statements about Braddan Commissioners being a classic case in point where after accusing the DHSC of not caring about the successful operation of a local amenity over the Southern Swimming Pool, she suggests on Manx Radio that her Department won’t allow a similar local amenity in Braddan to open because of a dispute over the road. Whether Rob Callister regards her as a pathetic shark remains the subject of some debate though - with Dr Haywood being advised by a Tynwald Standards Committee to reflect on the appropriate use of language in formal settings having told Mr Callister to fuck off in a meeting.
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Juan Watterson Gut afternoon mein host. 16 shandies mit the ginger beer. Private Frank Pike, Dad’s Army There hasn’t been that much to divert the attention of Mr Speaker from the temptations of the ceremonial fancy dress box this Tynwald sitting - save the solitary Deep South MHK pile-on over the Southern Swimming Pool. There must be voters in Rushen who still suffer Vietnam style flashbacks where they sort of remember that they did something in September 2021 but can’t for the life of them recall what it was because they couldn’t have possibly voted for Mr Watterson |  |
Jason Moorhouse I'll be back! The Cyberdyne Systems Model 101 It appears that sometime towards the end of the pandemic the relentless Castletown question asking cyborg that goes by the name of Jason Moorhouse decided that in the absence of anything tangible he could be recognised for he needed to create himself a political purpose to distract public attention. Presumably in order not to earn himself a reputation as a semi-coherent gammon faced Tynwald lounge lizard. Sadly for the people of Arbory, Castletown & Malew that invented purpose appears to be largely making sure that he is the primary source of the most number of pointless questions ever asked by a sitting member of Tynwald. We note with considerable glee that the ruddy faced robot still has over two years worth of daft questions to ask as yet which should more than make up for anything substantive he might not choose to do in the meantime - as it would appear that he would be out of his depth in a puddle never-mind a swimming pool! We hazard a guess that many in his constituency are anxiously waiting for 2026 to say Hasta la vista, baby! |  |
Tim Glover You have to do the best with what God gave you. Mrs Gump. Forrest Gump Where do we start with Covid Tim? He was the Manx Radio pandemic politics presenter who went a bit rogue on the government conspiracy train and built an audience around that. But can he now find a suitable role in a society that has pretty much returned to normal rather than the great new normal Tim was praying for as the Southern granny whisperer? Mr Glover woke up a little bit over the Southern Pool debacle but in the end landed some very limp wristed completely off mark punches during his 15 seconds of fame socking it to the DESC. All the focus now will invariably be on Castle Rushen school which should keep this one trick pony busy for the next two and a half years landing more noisy misdirected punches. |  |
Peel & Glenfaba | |
Kate Lloyd-Brennan Oh no not cheese. Sorry, it brings me out in a rash. Wendoline Ramsbottom We apologize once more as we are also struggling for content here as there isn’t much in the public domain to draw comment from other than last week’s inconvenient froth of Wensleydale floating in Peel Bay. Peel seems to have the lowest aspirations of any constituent group in the Isle of Man and as long as Peel still stays looking like grim old Peel the voters don’t really seem to be that bothered who ultimately represents them as they don’t want to see any change to anything anyway. Ms Lloyd-Brennan’s biggest risk would therefore seem to be the imminent prospect of more Chinese granite being placed in Michael Street or more cheesy floaters washing in on the next tide than anything else.
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Tim Crookall Clowns to the left of me. Jokers to the right Here I am stuck in the middle with you. Steelers Wheel. We like Tim but after Ray Harmer we don’t understand what it is about male politicians from Peel and sun-tans. Is there a Timeshare resort in Tenerife that specifically targets Peelites with cheap sales offers? That aside Mr Crookall makes us smile. Every ridiculous scheme or measure proposed by the DOI is met with a subtle incredulous wink or expression. He gives the impression of a man who knows his place. Which seems to largely be paid seventy thousand pounds a year to read from a script of lies written by incompetent people paid even more than he is at Ministeral Question Time. We await the confirmation that the Liverpool Terminal has now hit £100M with suitable theatrical eyebrow raising and head shaking from Tim - before he gets the next Ryanair back to Tenerife to top up his tan.
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