Avid followers of Gordon Murray’s 1960s Trumptonshire Trilogy will be well aware of the plight of poor Windy Miller - the lonely flour mill operator who lived at Colley’s Mill on the outskirts of Camberwick Green right next to the rather rustic railway station that was essential for the transport of his precious cargo to market. A position perhaps not unlike that of the operators of Laxey Glen Mills - quietly tucked away under the shadow of an imposing railway viaduct just outside the heart of deepest Trumptonshire-on-Sea.
In the rather twee Gordon Murray series Windy was a simple and superstitious man who believed in whistling for the wind to come and help him to grind his precious corn. But in later years Half Man Half Biscuit suggested in their 1989 release of The Trumpton Riots that “Windy Militant leads his Basque-like corn grinders to war. With windmill sails and bombs with nails they smash the town hall door” Which could well be the next phase in the fallout of the imminent closure of Ramsey Bakery. And who wants to deal with a load of militant corn grinders rioting? Certainly not Alf Cannan.
So what is the issue?
Well a private business has decided to shut up shop. Presumably for entirely sensible reasons that it doesn’t have to share with IOM Government. It’s hard driving owner sadly died a few years ago and the business climate has changed dramatically in the years since. Not to mention the impact of the pandemic, the recent fuel spike, and incredible increases in various IOM utility and operating costs in the last few months arising from the war in Ukraine and other factors. But the big problem with this planned closure of a private family business is that it is the cornerstone customer of one of the great Manx fake businesses - Laxey Glen Mills Limited. A weirdly antiquated state commune masquerading as a flour milling and distribution business and operating from decrepit premises that probably hold some sort of potential to be a future working tourist attraction which allows people to see how Windy Kelly eked out a dismal living in 1860.
So how did we get here?
Well it’s the usual story of Chinese-style State capitalism and cronyism that is so often seen in the Isle of Man. Where economic realities are glossed over - sometimes for decades by carefully appointed custodians. And where salary-men management teams are airbrushed into the woodwork by Treasury purely to oversee long term decay on salaries that other people would have to perform for in the private sector. It’s the same at the Meat Plant, the Trout Hatchery, and at any other state commune IOM Government has chosen to underwrite in complete opposition to the commercial reality the facilities operate in. Largely its failure to adapt to the 21st Century in any meaningful way because the strategic process of doing so would involve some sort of risk that the comfortable custodians, milking them for all they are worth in salaries despite diminishing returns, are unwilling to take.
So what are the options?
Well perhaps there is the prospect that The Trumpton Riots could well now happen. You can’t threaten the jobs of government supported workers without a backlash. The MEA used the argument that “the lights will go out” to secure substantial taxpayer underwriting many years ago. And a fire will certainly now be lit under Alf by all those fearful that they may now have to swim in the murky whirlpool of the profit focused private sector if it all comes to an end. As Half Man Half Biscuit also noted in The Trumpton Riots “Unemployment is rising in the Chigley end of town. And it’s spreading like pneumonia. Doesn’t look like its going down”
When that happens there will be calls for the taxpayer to [further] subsidise Laxey Glen Mills, or Ramsey Bakery, (or both) in order to keep these comfortable jobs marking time in a dying agricultural facility afloat. Our guess is that not many will be that bothered about the prospect of private sector Ramsey Bakery workers losing their jobs though. As usual private sector roles will be viewed as being non protected and it will be accepted that they will be left to fend for themselves. So here we see the prospect that a company may well be paid to stay open just to secure the jobs of its supply chain hangers on.
So we ask:
Do we need to protect the Manx food chain? (Yes)
Do we need to ensure quality local produce is still available? (Yes)
As taxpayers do we need to continue to underwrite a bad business strategy (No)
Can we get alternative providers into the system? (Yes)
Will such new providers rely on proper economics to sustain themselves? (Yes)
Is a private business within its right to close when deemed prudent to do so? (Yes)
Does a government agency so lacking in vision have the right to be propped up? (No)
Windy Miller: Like a mouse he's spry and nimble when he grinds the corn.
